I can only imagine how Carly Henley's mom must feel upon discovering what she said in an interview was a 3-hour tape of Carly playing her music. As the result of a random web search the other day I came across this brief video of what is Carly H. performing on stage in front of an audience. I know the entire (longer) performance would send chills up my spine if I could see it on tape now. The whole scenario makes her look so professional and so very clearly like a talented artist people want to listen to and watch.
***Edit*** to direct you to another wonderful video which apparently doubled as a Christmas present/homage to Carly from her younger sister, who has Carly's looks about her and who will be challenged as much as anybody to press on despite the loss of somebody so important. The video is amazing in that it fills in more of Carly's younger years for the outside observer. I hope that young lady has the wonderful life that was intended for Carly, and I hope she adjusts logically to evolution that will have her turning 40, and 50, and 75, while all the while Carly's striking appeal is forever paused at age 20. I hope Carly's family has as much strength and resolve on the inside as they appear to have from a distance.
Don't know how others are reconciling themselves to Carly's no longer being here just shy of three months since her death but I can say that the image of her I perceive today is just as vivid as it was nearly three months ago when I first learned of her. I wish that somewhere somebody was making a major effort to create a website in Carly's memory that would be a place in which to compile the many wonderful videos and pictures of Carly's life along with understanding about things like suicide, depression, and Zoloft. In addition, it would be comforting somehow if the outside world knew at least some of the details which comprised the last three months of Carly's time on earth, just to facilitate clearer understanding and perhaps greater comfort for those all over the world who care.
Of course lots of those ideas tread all over Carly's family's right to privacy, and I can certainly identify a giant impasse there. With the media being so set in its ways with regard to not reporting suicide and with "privacy" being such a prominent request, particularly in cases of death by suicide, it's no wonder the whole subject of suicide is so taboo.
Standard media everywhere is constantly updated and outdated by the internet and yet in this one area the internet has yet to fulfill more than a tiny part of its full potential. Were the internet utilized to its fullest potential, then there wouldn't even be any need for the rest of the mainstream media to touch upon suicide.
I wish for a website at which every available photo of Carly Henley could be compiled and every video online of Carly Henley could be hosted or linked. It should be so easy for anyone who ever knew or cared for Carly Henley to click on, say, carlyhenley.com and avail themselves of many wonderful memories.
Unfortunately, for reasons of copyright laws, it isn't even appropriate to begin such a website even though there are hundreds and hundreds of pictures out there of somebody who was extremely photogenic. I wish that would change, especially in the case of someone who has passed on.
The differences between Carly Henley and most other suicide victims seem most prominent in the areas of how many people closely followed and cared about Carly's life and her music. She had a considerably strong immediate support system and the arrows all point to atypical confusion and lack of understanding as to how Carly evolved to decide her eventual fate. Another giant difference about Carly is her radiant beauty of the sort which would cause even casual passers-by (such a website) to stop and comprehend any message represented there.
But y'know, it's one thing to be momentarily paused by exceptional two-dimensional physical beauty, but with Carly it is clear that she went the extra mile in life to express herself via her music in ways that most don't have the ability or confidence to do by age 20.
One thing I don't find myself doing or thinking is to ask or wonder: "Why couldn't she see how exceptional she was, and why wasn't that alone enough to cause her to want to find out about the future first-hand?"
I'm just not inclined to let my thoughts even get that far let alone care to answer that question. I'm quite content to feel that Carly Henley was just someone with whom the powerful anti-depressant drug Zoloft did not agree. I don't hold anybody in her circles responsible and I don't even fault the system (particularly since the system acknowledges the potential for "suicidality in persons under 25 years of age" as a possible effect of Zoloft).
When somebody burns themselves with hot coffee at McDonald's, and we as a society respond with labeling that assures "this product may be HOT", we still further educate toddlers and other small children about hot water and hot coffee. Society needs to do something similar in relation to anti-depressants and the potential for suicide - not in a clinical/statistical scenario, but in a way so that real people will inspire their own interest and further understanding.
The loss of someone as enviable as Carly Henley could be just the means through which many more people might be inspired to educate themselves further about the risk factors relating both to depression and to anti-depressant drugs.
Because she was both a "real girl with all the flaws" and because she at the same time was enviable, attractive and accomplished, people will relate to her and want to take further interest in the message she represents. None of Carly's online photos ever go north of being G-rated and yet they are still entirely compelling and usually flawless. (Imagine a girl who, after two years of college, still can't be found pictured with any beverage stronger than vitamin water)
She just... has the sort of radiance that would burn and burn brightly for as long as somebody somewhere would make the effort to maintain a web-hosted tribute site to her. It has to be someone who can inspire others to allow free use of the many photos and videos of Carly from all over the world she knew.
Carly Henley was someone I'd never even heard of before she took her own life at the age of 20 while a talented, popular and attractive junior at university. She seemed the person nobody would ever guess for such a fate. The media doesn't generally cover suicide but Carly Henley could inspire so much caring and understanding and it has to start somewhere... I attempt to present this blog without hurting or offending Carly Henley's family or anyone else but suicide is a delicate subject.
I learned of the death of college student Carly Henley two days after her passing, on October 6, 2010. In the days soon to follow it became clear that scores and scores of people were wounded to the core by the loss. Wonderful evidence around the internet serves to almost suspend Carly Henley's personable allure, her impressive musical talent, and a short life the likes of which most anybody could envy.
Various reports tell of her short term struggle with depression of perhaps three months in duration. Significant in that was the introduction of anti-depressant drug Zoloft via prescription some two weeks before Carly took her own life.
Not lost on me now, finally, is the wording in the "Black Box Warning" with Zoloft, which states that antidepressants may increase the risk of suicidal thinking and behavior in persons younger than 25. Risk is especially heightened during the first two months of taking anti-depressants.
The labels on anti-depressant drugs in the U.S. were altered to reference young adults aged 18 to 24 just three years earlier - in 2007.
It is my belief, now, that Carly just happened to land among the small percentage of anti-depressant users who are susceptible to being so affected by a powerful drug such as Zoloft.
One need not ever have known such a remarkable woman to feel the pain all around at the loss of Carly Henley.
So many life lessons are so well represented by Carly Henley's compelling spirit. Let me see if I can help some to gain fuller appreciation for a woman who continues to inspire everyone who ever knew of her.
Various reports tell of her short term struggle with depression of perhaps three months in duration. Significant in that was the introduction of anti-depressant drug Zoloft via prescription some two weeks before Carly took her own life.
Not lost on me now, finally, is the wording in the "Black Box Warning" with Zoloft, which states that antidepressants may increase the risk of suicidal thinking and behavior in persons younger than 25. Risk is especially heightened during the first two months of taking anti-depressants.
The labels on anti-depressant drugs in the U.S. were altered to reference young adults aged 18 to 24 just three years earlier - in 2007.
It is my belief, now, that Carly just happened to land among the small percentage of anti-depressant users who are susceptible to being so affected by a powerful drug such as Zoloft.
One need not ever have known such a remarkable woman to feel the pain all around at the loss of Carly Henley.
So many life lessons are so well represented by Carly Henley's compelling spirit. Let me see if I can help some to gain fuller appreciation for a woman who continues to inspire everyone who ever knew of her.
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