Recently there was a big cover story on People Magazine about the suicide of Tyler Clementi, the gay college student who opted to take his own life after video of him making out with another male was posted online by Tyler's then roommate. Tyler died less than three weeks before Carly Henley's suicide.
There can't be a literate soul on this earth who doesn't understand Tyler Clementi's motive for taking his own life, and yet we put that suicide in the media where few will actually learn anything from it, while the media sticks to its own selective guns in leaving other suicides unmentioned.
Society wants to understand why the likes of Carly Henley would take their own life, and it is through tackling the more challenging puzzles like those that we, collectively, could gain understanding which would inspire us to change our ways and interact differently with one another.
It is probably true that the poor choices made by Carly Henley and by Tyler Clementi were essentially equally poor, yet understanding of one arrives with crystal clarity and the other, unless like me you wholly subscribe to the idea that Zoloft was the central reason, remains a considerable mystery. EVEN IF Zoloft could be definitively said to be the cause of Carly Henley's suicide it would help to know that, in order so that data about anti-depressant drugs could be updated, and so that friends and family could comfortably cease to feel any blame on their own shoulders.
Both Tyler and Carly would have evolved to be in more tolerable and eventually comfortable places in life had they each chosen to live. It is in part because talk of suicide is so taboo that neither could bravely reach out toward anyone in their respective realms when contemplating their shared final destiny. This observer can't imagine a soul who wouldn't have given their all to inspire Carly Henley toward a better fate, and Tyler was at a university with 11,000 students, many of whom could relate, while there were trained staff who could have dealt with anything Tyler could have been feeling. If only either had bothered to reach out...
The media in one form or another is becoming more and more prominent in the lives of citizens of the western world. Even though that influence is evolving away from television and radio toward hand-held communication devices, it is still media influence which sets so many trends in the western world.
Maybe in light of the fact that through the use of computer technology, persons contemplating suicide can 'feel' more anonymous when reaching out for help than ever before, it might be time to revisit the possibly-outdated ideas that "it isn't OK to talk about suicide" and that the media shouldn't ever mention suicide in order to keep copycats from taking their own lives in response.
Eventually it should be reflexive that someone on the verge of suicide should first go through a set of societal checks and balances as the rule, and not as the rare exception, before making a final choice.
I've never been extremely near to an eventual suicide victim, but among those I've heard or read about I would be hard-pressed to match Carly Henley in the category of being completely revered by just about everyone in her surroundings.
As the weeks and months pass, I find myself with ever increasing awareness of just to what extent Carly's cousins went to etch her vast appeal into the CD they released in her memory some eight months after her death. You should listen to the entire CD here, and order it here, or on ITunes.
Carly Henley was someone I'd never even heard of before she took her own life at the age of 20 while a talented, popular and attractive junior at university. She seemed the person nobody would ever guess for such a fate. The media doesn't generally cover suicide but Carly Henley could inspire so much caring and understanding and it has to start somewhere... I attempt to present this blog without hurting or offending Carly Henley's family or anyone else but suicide is a delicate subject.
I learned of the death of college student Carly Henley two days after her passing, on October 6, 2010. In the days soon to follow it became clear that scores and scores of people were wounded to the core by the loss. Wonderful evidence around the internet serves to almost suspend Carly Henley's personable allure, her impressive musical talent, and a short life the likes of which most anybody could envy.
Various reports tell of her short term struggle with depression of perhaps three months in duration. Significant in that was the introduction of anti-depressant drug Zoloft via prescription some two weeks before Carly took her own life.
Not lost on me now, finally, is the wording in the "Black Box Warning" with Zoloft, which states that antidepressants may increase the risk of suicidal thinking and behavior in persons younger than 25. Risk is especially heightened during the first two months of taking anti-depressants.
The labels on anti-depressant drugs in the U.S. were altered to reference young adults aged 18 to 24 just three years earlier - in 2007.
It is my belief, now, that Carly just happened to land among the small percentage of anti-depressant users who are susceptible to being so affected by a powerful drug such as Zoloft.
One need not ever have known such a remarkable woman to feel the pain all around at the loss of Carly Henley.
So many life lessons are so well represented by Carly Henley's compelling spirit. Let me see if I can help some to gain fuller appreciation for a woman who continues to inspire everyone who ever knew of her.
Various reports tell of her short term struggle with depression of perhaps three months in duration. Significant in that was the introduction of anti-depressant drug Zoloft via prescription some two weeks before Carly took her own life.
Not lost on me now, finally, is the wording in the "Black Box Warning" with Zoloft, which states that antidepressants may increase the risk of suicidal thinking and behavior in persons younger than 25. Risk is especially heightened during the first two months of taking anti-depressants.
The labels on anti-depressant drugs in the U.S. were altered to reference young adults aged 18 to 24 just three years earlier - in 2007.
It is my belief, now, that Carly just happened to land among the small percentage of anti-depressant users who are susceptible to being so affected by a powerful drug such as Zoloft.
One need not ever have known such a remarkable woman to feel the pain all around at the loss of Carly Henley.
So many life lessons are so well represented by Carly Henley's compelling spirit. Let me see if I can help some to gain fuller appreciation for a woman who continues to inspire everyone who ever knew of her.
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