I learned of the death of college student Carly Henley two days after her passing, on October 6, 2010. In the days soon to follow it became clear that scores and scores of people were wounded to the core by the loss. Wonderful evidence around the internet serves to almost suspend Carly Henley's personable allure, her impressive musical talent, and a short life the likes of which most anybody could envy.

Various reports tell of her short term struggle with depression of perhaps three months in duration. Significant in that was the introduction of anti-depressant drug Zoloft via prescription some two weeks before Carly took her own life.

Not lost on me now, finally, is the wording in the "Black Box Warning" with Zoloft, which states that antidepressants may increase the risk of suicidal thinking and behavior in persons younger than 25. Risk is especially heightened during the first two months of taking anti-depressants.

The labels on anti-depressant drugs in the U.S. were altered to reference young adults aged 18 to 24 just three years earlier - in 2007.

It is my belief, now, that Carly just happened to land among the small percentage of anti-depressant users who are susceptible to being so affected by a powerful drug such as Zoloft.

One need not ever have known such a remarkable woman to feel the pain all around at the loss of Carly Henley.


So many life lessons are so well represented by Carly Henley's compelling spirit. Let me see if I can help some to gain fuller appreciation for a woman who continues to inspire everyone who ever knew of her.



So what, if anything, makes Carly different than so many others...?

It wouldn't take long to do a Google image search for the phrases "took her own life" and/or "ended her own life".  Once you do that you can't help but click on some of those pictures in an attempt to learn the stories behind them.  The other teens and young adults represented usually had something more of a human catalyst than did Carly Henley, for whom Zoloft seemed to be the most likely underlying inspiration for her choice.

Things like 'cyber bullying', 'sexting', romance gone awry, and in-person bullying at school inspired many of the young females I found to have taken their own lives.  Their stories are touching and sad, as one might expect, while their friends and families do what they can to remind themselves to always remember...

The occasional victim represented herself on YouTube in ways similar to how Carly Henley recorded her music there.  The spirit with which someone named Jenna Bowers (Boynton) presented her music to the world from her home in eastern Canada parallels Carly's efforts that way.  I really like young Jenna's guitar effort at "You Shook Me All Night Long" by AC/DC.  With time and better YouTube quality, she'd have been amazing on that one.

But is there something different from most of the others about Carly's story and the aftermath to her life?  or does it only seem so because that's the tale with which we are most familiar?  It just seems that in nearly every instance of reading about the suicide of another young woman, I come across some deeply regrettable human element to the last chapter of her life - Something that really isn't there in Carly Henley, at least as known by the world outside her family and close friends.

Perhaps even more prominent is the incredible life experience Carly seemed to have while she shared this earth.  Carly was deep, caring, and expressive and it stands to reason that she was surrounded by others who shared those traits.  Her natural beauty complemented the sincerity others saw in Carly and made for a force toward which most around her were eventually drawn.

To this day Carly's family and friends continue to help those unfamiliar have a chance to witness the span of Carly's life through various online tributes.  So far it seems that the depth, quality and effort which went into those tributes to Carly marks a considerable difference.  No matter whether one wants to envy her life, or just admire Carly Henley in the following linked videos there are plenty of reasons to enjoy them:

The first was an effort by one of Carly's dear friends to mark Carly's would-have-been 21st birthday about 10 days ago.  A highlight of that one is when Carly is sitting in somebody's bedroom (??) with her guitar singing the first line of her ultra-impressive song "Star".  She begins "This is a song for any girl..." but before getting even that far she fumbles something and says "...shit!" (and then everybody bursts out laughing)

That same friend offered some months earlier this touching tribute video during which Carly's telephone voice and its sincerity can be witnessed and enjoyed by YouTube viewers.  The video chronicles a great friendship Carly got to enjoy as well.  Fair warning:  you could get side-tracked at the friend's YouTube channel - for it seems she can laugh at herself, and that's a potent ingredient on YouTube.

Another video I re-discovered this week was done by a different close friend just a week after Carly's death, on October 6, 2010.  I can barely fathom how that young woman must've felt when putting her video together one week later.

Then there was this touching video shared by Carly's younger sister as a Christmas present to Carly. Some of the photos and videos she uses are more precious than perhaps YouTube deserves.  I sort of favor a shot where Carly's hand is covering the I in "I Carly" (from U.S. television) while younger sister Blake is pointing and mocking.  There are so many in there you could adore.

Here's another tribute video which landed on YouTube on the very day following Carly's passing.  The video which was played at her memorial features Carly's own music and a general sense of her young adult life at University.

One of the many videos on Carly's own YouTube channel is this gem in which she performs with a trio of classmates while wearing her crown as Homecoming Queen.  That sets up this sentimental performance at a local coffee shop by the same four students, each then young adults some 2 1/2 years later and not four months before Carly's death.  Carly seems to glow with radiance the whole way through.

Lastly, perhaps the video that got it all started, which was taken at her high school's talent competition of performer Carly who was nervous yet who clearly had a great deal of talent under wraps.  As testimony to her modesty, notice the casual attire and consider the fact that new YouTuber Carly didn't even feel the need to mention online that she'd been the winner at said talent competition.

There's surely a reason why the album of Carly's music released some 8 months after her death is titled "Love the Skin You're In".  You can listen to the whole CD here and you can purchase her CD at this link or on ITunes.

So, what's different about Carly Henley's story than most?  Well, it remains difficult to get through her whole story and see anything other than the daughter most everybody would want to have and nurture for those first, precious twenty years.  Carly clearly had blessings all over which most never get to know.

Looking back, though, you can't help but figure out that without her insecurities Carly Henley just couldn't have developed the genuine character and qualities which evolved to draw so many people to her.  Also, anybody can conclude from Carly Henley and her family that life is so precious, and that may be just the sort of motivation others need to strengthen their resolve to stay closer to their loved ones, just in case...

If something like Zoloft can have such an effect on the likes of Carly Henley, then others, who are sometimes truly tormented by elements of society all around us, probably deserve much more of our attention and concern.  Before it's too late...
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