I learned of the death of college student Carly Henley two days after her passing, on October 6, 2010. In the days soon to follow it became clear that scores and scores of people were wounded to the core by the loss. Wonderful evidence around the internet serves to almost suspend Carly Henley's personable allure, her impressive musical talent, and a short life the likes of which most anybody could envy.

Various reports tell of her short term struggle with depression of perhaps three months in duration. Significant in that was the introduction of anti-depressant drug Zoloft via prescription some two weeks before Carly took her own life.

Not lost on me now, finally, is the wording in the "Black Box Warning" with Zoloft, which states that antidepressants may increase the risk of suicidal thinking and behavior in persons younger than 25. Risk is especially heightened during the first two months of taking anti-depressants.

The labels on anti-depressant drugs in the U.S. were altered to reference young adults aged 18 to 24 just three years earlier - in 2007.

It is my belief, now, that Carly just happened to land among the small percentage of anti-depressant users who are susceptible to being so affected by a powerful drug such as Zoloft.

One need not ever have known such a remarkable woman to feel the pain all around at the loss of Carly Henley.


So many life lessons are so well represented by Carly Henley's compelling spirit. Let me see if I can help some to gain fuller appreciation for a woman who continues to inspire everyone who ever knew of her.



This would be Carly Henley's 30th birthday


Just when we were considering and tallying all of the goodness that Carly Henley surely missed by taking her own life On October 6, 2010, now we are confronted by a world-wide pandemic which has suddenly caused the entire world to pause somewhat, like nothing that people born well before 1990 have ever seen.




Tiz probably fair to suggest that no one knows if or how long it will take to fully tame the Coronavirus, and it is certain that most can have a major effect on their own likelihood of surviving the virus if willing to stay inside places from which few people come and go.

Realistically, these Coronavirus times are merely a training exercise for when something much more taxing on human life comes along from an as yet unforeseen direction.  Yet this virus is still significant on its own.

Of course it would be grand for the world to have Carly Henley here among those doing what they can to both survive and move past these challenging times.  Yet this is still the nearest thing to something that some wouldn't wish upon various friends and relatives.

A look around the interwebs assures that lots of other people have been caused to know limited celebration while turning 30 in 2020 as Carly would be doing today.

 

Some write:

"This birthday will be one to remember. I can’t believe I am celebrating my 30th birthday during a pandemic. I was lucky enough to take a trip to Mexico in early February to celebrate."

'Wow. 30! What an adventure that was.... You, out there - that have supported me - thank you. Thank you for all your kindness. Thanks for having my back.'
"Sending all the love I have inside of my heart to the beautiful souls I’ve had the fortune of meeting over the last 30 years. What a journey it has been, and in many ways, it’s only just beginning."

"Yesterday I turned 30… yes in quarantine, something I will never forget.
If you would have asked me a few months ago how I was suppose to spend my birthday it was a girls weekend in Grand Rapids where I would run the Gazelle Girls half-marathon to celebrate, then a flight out to Texas to see friends and celebrate a friend getting married and ending on my 30th birthday (a Monday) with a run around my favorite spots in Houston, lunch at my favorite sandwich place and ending the night with Houston’s famous margaritas and moon drivers. I had it all planned and then the COVID-19 virus hit our world. Like many, it shook the plans I had, the picture of the future in my head and left me in quarantine within the four walls of my home with puppy Denver."

""I wrote 'Be A Light' last year as a way to process negativity and sadness I was seeing in the world," said Rhett. "Now, as I sit in my home with my family on my 30th birthday, we are in the middle of a world-wide pandemic affecting every single human on earth, all while our town of Nashville is still healing from devastating tornadoes that destroyed so much of our city less than one month ago. But, among the wreckage, I see us come together in ways I never dreamed possible. I knew in my heart this was the time to share this message with the world and our community. The voices who join me on this track are some of the brightest lights I know. I hope this song serves as a reminder that we are all in this together."

"If you'd asked me a month ago what I thought I'd be up to on my 30th birthday, being confined to a government quarantine center in Hong Kong wasn't near the top of the list.
But the coronavirus pandemic has derailed a lot of plans -- and even in a city that's grown used to upheaval, the recent sudden shift in response to a surge in Covid-19 cases has been startling.
For me, it's meant going from planning holidays and parties, to being escorted from my apartment by hazmat-suited health care workers and driven to a quarantine facility for two weeks of isolation. For everyone else, it's meant a speedy reassessment of how to respond to a global crisis, on both a personal and societal level -- and a new understanding of just how strict the measures to fight coronavirus might have to be.

Holiday camp turned quarantine camp

Life in quarantine -- with its regimented meals, temperature checks and PPE-wearing staff -- feels like an odd mix of being in school, at camp, and in prison. My facility, in Lei Yue Mun Park, is normally a leafy holiday village in the east of Hong Kong Island. Now, some 100 temporary single-room homes have been constructed in neat rows on an outdoor sports pitch, surrounded by high yellow barriers, housing anyone who the health department decides needs to be isolated after coming into contact with a person who has tested positive for coronavirus."


If we have to envision something in the way of a would-be Carly Henley today, at age 30, it would be most realistic to choose:   "... at home, as a mom...  married well, and sheltering her child(ren) from the concerning world out there".
People around the USA (at least along the coasts) are going nuts over Coronavirus, but the country of Qatar has an infection rate more than 3.5 times that of the USA... thus it must be presently realistic that it could be a LOT worse than it is in most of the USA as of July 30, 2020.
As of this writing, the zip code of Carly Henley's last official residence has 1 positive Covid test for every 171 residents, which to some surprise is a rate of more positive tests than in the surrounding county (about 1 in 200 as of this writing).  The USA as a whole recently crossed the point where more than 1% of the population (of 331 Million) has tested positive for Coronavirus at some point.  (so in Qatar, more than 3.5% of everyone has tested positive at some point)
Everyone wishes they could know  with certainty what Carly's life would be like today, and even if it was the best imaginable place and outlook, it might still be a relief of a sort to those left instead having to recognize the whole breadth of her future potential from the moment before she left this earth.
Looking months ahead at writing this particular entry it never crossed my thoughts that there might be any shared-by-many societal routine that we wouldn't wish Carly would experience as well (and that does not mean acquiring Coronavirus ), but now, semi-suddenly, there is something that we've all gone through that we would not wish upon her, or anyone.
(***not meaning to say that we don't all wish Carly Danielle Henley were right here taking her chances...  the same chances as the rest of us... in the face of Coronavirus...   but... just...  that this is, finally, one hurdle on the path that we wouldn't wish upon anyone)
Coronavirus is still at a stage where for the most part we in the semi-comfortable world can if we want to control our own fate.  There is false inspiration out there in the way of the death rate from Covid seeming to be going down...  but that is not tempered in media reports by the obvious reality that early testing was done predominantly on senior citizens, whose rate of death once acquiring Coronavirus has always been quite high.  Only later did the (m)asses reconvene their social interaction while trading the virus liberally back and forth, sometimes as a joke.  Naturally, when these younger people in their 20's and 30's did indeed lose the amusing-to-them games Corona roulette, those who acquired the virus lived through it at a higher rate than did the heavily-leaning-senior crowd tested in the early days.

It is quite remarkable to be here at this stage of truly not knowing what will occur next with regard to Coronavirus.  Every previous July 30 since 2011 arrived with a given expectation that the path ahead was surely rosy, even if less so because Carly Henley and her ilk weren't sharing it.  Yet now, to great surprise, we don't know for sure if the path immediately ahead is so rosy.
Coronavirus, more specifically its spread, seems to be a function of populations with wealth, freedom, and destination appeal being those most inclined to have the strongest representation of Coronavirus infections in the population.
Qatar is said to have the wealthiest citizens on the planet... and Americans have wealth, freedom, and destination appeal all combining to boost their Coronavirus numbers.   France, Spain and Italy were early leaders in Coronavirus numbers and each of those has significant destination appeal to travelers if not also relative wealth among the people.
Consider, finally, that these recent Coronavirus numbers have been climbing steadily even while the friendly skies have been mostly limited to the foolish and clueless.  Just what does it all become (if) evvvverybody starts flying all over the globe again?
Hopefully everyone in Carly Henley's 2010 circles has been successful in dodging the virus, and hopefully they are happy to have one more few-minute read while passing quarantine time.

Happy 30th birthday to Carly Henley.    (July 30, 1990 - October 6, 2010)   RIP


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